Phnom Penh

We were no where walking through the city, yet I promptly thought it was one sad city. There was just too much unhealed pain that needed some serious treatment. A walk down Tonlé Sap River slightly revealed what actually happens. People here were trying so hard to find their self-defined happiness; through selling things in order to get money that would ease them up in getting more things that supposedly make them feelhappier. Through street performing kids who were taught to dance and dress in a she-male manner in return for money and cheering passer-by. Applause is nice, and getting cheered on definitely boost one's self-esteem, and you feel better upon yourself. Through building pagodas and burning incense as they do their prayers, aside from bringing the gift to ther gods so that they would hear them praying. Through making crafts and selling them as charity, to ease up their fellow unhappy citizen, although it was initiated by foreigners NGOs. Through building monuments or simply by going out with foreigners because it simply is good money. All efforts are justifiable if you've been through what they had gone.

In some way, it is sad. But seeing it differently, the trauma marked by countless incidents that scar their history, neglegancy and ignorance by the governing party probably helps the ambience that was built. They were probably as threatened as Vietnam was with communism and socialism. Quoting a friend, this country is probably the result of what the Americans had feared Vietnam would be had they not interfered. Alas, Vietnamese find themselves struggled and fought  to gain and stand on their own feet, regardless the cost of their lives. But, here, the Cambodians were forced to lose their feet, by the people they hope would lead them to find one. Who could actually recover when your fellow nationmen - to whom you entrust your being - killed their senses to kill yours? Continuously telling you how you could (and should) never proceed beyond others.

They are beautiful. They maintain the most sincere smiles. The one that shows faith that gods, king, the government, or whoever they entrusted to earn their happiness; would eventually give it to them for real. It is only yet to come, and they don't mind the waiting. As Mada patiently wait our  snobbish will to go around.

Tonlé Sap River

For Non, whose eyes made me fell in love. He's 2, yet he ruled my world as Ena patiently sit and smile after a purchase of cold mineral water she sold - a result of numerous attempt within the second encounter.

All picture is the courtesy of Abimantrana. January 2010